Kate moss or Marilyn Monroe. Is it even fair to ask this question?
Well, lets think about it, if an alien from outer space decided to research earth before he came for a visit and his only means was through magazines and television shows, I would imagine the Alien would have an idea that most earthling women have a physique somewhat close to that of Kate Moss. No lumps or bumps or wobbly bits to be seen. But then, if this same Alien landed down on earth onto any busy city street in the Western world he may be quite alarmed to see many earthling women actually look nothing like the thin lanky girls in the magazines and T.V shows that he researched… all of them a bit roundier, a bit curvier, and well, they might have a few more lumps and bumps!
This little alien would probably be scratching his head in utter confusion…
Why do the woman in the magazines not look anything like the women on the street?!
Why? Because we live in an age where perceptions of what we should be are derived from the media’s portrait of the perfect women, but this portrait fails to reflect reality! It’s true that slowly (very slowly) things are changing somewhat, but I think it may just about be time to speed things up here and start a revolution!
How do you feel in your skin right now? And if your answer is anything other than utterly fabulous then PLEASE scrutinize where this negative self-image is coming from?
I think you’ll find the finger does point to our media, because did you know from the 1930’s to the 1950’s they were doing the same thing, only in reverse. Women were thinner back then, because the food wasn’t as plentiful and the lifestyle meant they shed more calories in a day then we do. This very same media was telling these slim women to get curvy, put on some pounds because thin was ugly and no one would find them attractive! This was the age where the Marilyn Monroe body was what we were all supposed to attain.
“Skinny girls are not glamorous girls.”
“If you want to be popular you can’t afford to be skinny.”
Skip forward 50 years or so, and we now live in a world where food is more plentiful, (thank god), but we unfortunately are not as active as we used to be, and so a lot of the female society has reached, or far surpassed the curviness of Miss Monroe, and what does the media do? Glorify the other extreme. A gorgeous, size zero, Victoria’s Secret model, struts sown the runway, and now this is the idol of perfection. It’s the age of the Kate Moss physique.
But so what does this tell you? It tells me it’s time to make a stand. We should make a promise to ourselves that we will refuse to be brainwashed, manipulated and made feel unworthy any longer because of our dress size. We are all worthy no matter what size we are. Of course, we can’t blame the media entirely because it’s our choice what we do with this information but it is difficult when an “idea” of beauty is heralded day in, day out and we all feel the need to match up to what may be impossible standards. We need to take responsibility in feeling good in our own skin and teach that to the new generation of women. We need to start loving ourselves just the way we are. Bruno Mars couldn’t have said it better “Girl you’re amazing just the way you are!” That’s probably why his song was such a huge hit!
(Just to flip a coin here, I want to share something too. As a naturally thin woman in this society, believe or not I’ve grown up with my fair share of bullying. I’ve been told, “you’re too thin! Would you ever put on some weight?” “Scrawny” “Scarecrow” “Bones” “Spindly fingers” and then anything in the media that is pro-curvy automatically is extremely anti- thin. Thin women are described as not real woman only skeletons for their lack of curves! The point is, whether you are thin or curvy, nasty words still hurt!)
But no more of this Curvy vs. Thin! Now it’s time to stop! Curves aside, the only important question, which we should all ask ourselves is, are we HEALTHY? Being healthy is what’s really important. Let’s look and concentrate on eating the right amount of calories from the most nutrient dense food we possibly can. Indulging on occasions when we feel like it. Getting that heart going at least 2-3 three times a week with some exercise and hanging out with friends, having lots of laughs. And loving yourself as fully as you possibly can, just the way you are!
One of my favorite actresses right now is Lena Dunham, from the HBO series Girls. She has lumps, bumps, cellulite, the whole shebang, and when she recently attended a red carpet event showing off her untanned, untoned thighs, the media pounced on her.
But she is purposely putting it out there as a testament to how it’s okay to not look perfect like every other actress. It’s okay to be yourself, just as you are, as long as you are truly happy in your body. She hit back at critics saying;
“I don’t think a girl with tiny thighs would have received such attention. My response is, “Get used to it because I am going to live to be 100, and I am going to show my thighs every day till I die.”
Now if we could all just be that comfortable in our own skin!
So let’s start spreading this message of body positivity to one another. Start by telling a sister, friend, mother, daughter she looks beautiful!
You see, neither Marilyn nor Kate is more beautiful than the other because while the old adage says beauty is in the eye of the beholder the truth is beauty shines through the eyes of the one who embraces their own skin and loves themselves fully. This is what was special about Moss and Monroe. They both embraced their different body types, and the world recognized this and thats what we should really try to emulate. Being our true selves and loving every big or small bit of ourselves.
And in saying that, I want to remind you that “Eat like an Actress” doesn’t mean eating to be thin it means eating to be healthy and having the best possible quality of life you can have.
“You have to build a normal relationship with exercise and food. For me it’s not about looking like a supermodel – it’s about feeling good about who I am naturally.”
– America Ferrara, Star of Ugly Betty.
Thank you to my wonderful sister Fiona for this wonderful and inspiring guest blog ! Love you 🙂